How to make your husband to wither inside

Posted on Aug 24, 2011 in Marriage

Passive husbandJust a little note for the laides out there: be sensitive when correcting your husband in front of other people.

Your husband naturally values godly feedback from you, but if it feels condescending, critical, or like a personal attack, you’ll cause him to wither inside.

Guys have two primary responses when this happens: he will either snap back, making for a really awkward moment in front of everyone (even if you don’t feel it) that is ultimately unproductive, or he will clam up and eventually stop making decisions, and you will grow to resent your husband for being so passive.

Thankfully, Dana knows this and is sensitive to correcting me and giving me a better perspective on my family and ministry decisions when we’re alone, but when I see other wives doing this to their husbands, ugh, my heart really goes out to that guy. Besides feeling terribly uncomfortable, I pray their marriage lasts before one of them eventually snaps.

Wives, your husband needs to feel like you respect him, both in public and in private (Ephesians 5:33). Doing so will truly empower him to be the man of God you desire.

QUESTION: Husbands, what is your typical response when you feel like your wife doesn’t respect you? Wives, honestly, what’s your typical response when your husband’s decision needs guidance?

About the author,

Tim is a dad who is imperfectly pursuing his wife and children while ultimately trying to pursue the Lord's vision for his family. He's written a few books and dabbles in online video, mostly to support his primary ministry at home.

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