Why isn’t your wife serving more in ministry?

Posted on Jul 27, 2011 in Featured, Marriage

Wife serving in ministryChurch member: “Why isn’t your wife helping out more with the children’s ministry?”

Your first thought: “Why isn’t your wife helping out with the children’s ministry?” but what actually comes out, “What do you mean?”

Church member thinks: “You’re the paid pastor and your wife doesn’t seem to do enough,” but what actually comes out, “Oh, you know, she seems to enjoy children and they need a lot of help in there right now since the Smiths left the church.”

You think: “Then why are you having this conversation with me instead of my wife? And why don’t you serve there?” but what actually comes out, “____________.”

You fill in the blank in the comments below!

How do you respond when the church holds certain expectations for your spouse that they don’t hold for the typical church member? Do you fill in the blank with a bunch of excuses for why your wife can’t do it? Do you start rattling off all the other ministry your wife is involved in to make it sound like she’s too busy serving in other places (even if it’s true)? Do you accept the pressure from the church member and in-turn put some pressure on your wife to fill the ministry hole? Do you simply say no for her without trying to talk the church member into agreeing with your answer?

QUESTION: Finish the conversation above. How would you respond in this situation?

About the author,

Tim is a dad who is imperfectly pursuing his wife and children while ultimately trying to pursue the Lord's vision for his family. He's written a few books and dabbles in online video, mostly to support his primary ministry at home.

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